to love and be loved.

Why is the majority of humans so afraid to love? To be in love, to have someone in love with them? I have so many amazing, beautiful, inspiring, sexy, wonderful human beings as friends and yet more than half of them are single. And have been for quite some time.

i recently told a very close friend, whom is very beautiful, talented and our connection is strong, that i was falling love with him.

i think it scared him away.

I love, fully, intensely and strongly.
and then sometimes i don't.

I'm not attached to love, I just love. with my heart. fully.

rejection was something i wasn't used to in my past. and i've been rejected now. It hurt at first, and then I came to conclusion that it was the best possible thing, that human being wasn't right for me.

I just don't understand why it's so hard to love.

It's free
fun, beautiful, exciting, positive, playful, fulfilling and inspiring.

maybe it's more the commitment that humans are afraid of. Committing to one human being and calling it love.

a quote that I read recently that made me laugh.

“We’re all a little weird. And life is weird. And when we find someone
whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall into
mutually satisfying weirdness—and call it love—true love.” 


Dr Seuss 


I also suppose it's called patience, waiting to find the right person. The mutual weird person who completes me. 

i am thankful

that i live in such a beautiful place and have such beautiful friends and family around me.

what a beautiful day.

<3

Looking for Love - Anuhea

Perfection is Bliss

Feeling funny, eyes making designs with the stars.
Moon beams dripping down the blue blue ocean sky.
Crop circles ingulfing the supermoon,
palm trees flashing tinsel green.
the ukulele strumming and my ring running and spinning around my body.
laughing.
jaw hurts.
tears of joy and pain.

soft silky sand slipping softly
through my toes.

buddha. thank you

mommy. i love you.

hold my hand. please don't let go.

mermaids exist. didn't you know?

p.s.
i am so in love with you.

i wish you would kiss me.

Anuhea Come Over Love (Official Video)

direction.

these past few weeks have been a blur. a horrible, painful, torturing blur. 

and now. i am. 

and in all honestly i have no idea how to be. 

what to do with my life. 

what direction to turn. 

i want to travel. 

i can go almost anywhere. 

and in all honesty i have no idea where to go. 

i want to escape. 

to leave the "how are you?"s 

and the

"oh i heard, i'm so sorry"

If you haven't been involved in the process. don't say anything to my face. don't ask. 

it's annoying. 

i have really enjoyed all the messages, texts and attempts at phone calls. ( sorry i don't tend to pick up) 

i get the same questions. 

what am i supposed to say?

my mom just died. and i watched it happen. 

so yea "i'm great!" 

fuck that. 

i want to run off to some country and have a beautiful love affair with some amazing man who is sweet, passionate, kind, sexy, fun, wealthy, and has an accent. and is total into me of course. 

i want to run away. 

maybe i'm not running away from something

maybe i'm wanting to run to something. 

i'm just not sure what that is quite yet. 

Creator please guide my journey in the right direction. 

Mahalo 

To My Mother

i carry your heart with me(i carry it in

my heart)i am never without it(anywhere

i go you go,my dear;and whatever is done

by only me is your doing,my darling)

                                                      i fear

no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want

no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)

and it’s you are whatever a moon has always meant

and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows

(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud

and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows

higher than soul can hope or mind can hide)

and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)

and i love you.